Just call me Igor...

So the plan for the latest thrilling installment was to bang on about how pleased I was that I managed to run 10k in under 55mins (in the gym of course. Yours truly wasn’t brave enough to venture outside... there was a distinct winter nip in the air).

The first thing I’ve learnt about running for nearly an hour is that it gets boring very quickly. And the best you can hope for is that either your iPod keeps you entertained, or that you just completely zone out whilst turning into some sort of huffing and puffing red-faced zombie on the treadmill. (Maybe the advantage to running outside is that you don’t have to run in front of a wall of mirrors?).

Anyway, my attempts to stride off the treadmill looking macho were somewhat scuppered by my right leg refusing to work and a short, sharp restricting pain at the back of my leg which caused me to limp across the gym rather pathetically whilst feeling rather lame.

Cue a trip to physio.

The good news is I apparently have 'incredible natural muscle strength'. Ha! Knew it… Rock hard, me.

The bad news is I have to stop running for 10 days, see a chiropractor and be snapped back into shape (boo) followed by lots of ‘soft tissue therapy’ i.e. massage (hoorah).

Diagnosis is as follows:

1) I have “very interesting biomechanics” (loosely translates as ‘you’re screwed’). 

2) Apparently there is pressure on my siactic nerve (what?) and lumbar lordosis (hamstrings to you and me).

3) I need to strengthen my transverse abdominal muscle (stomach muscles – i.e do some sit ups and cut out the KFC)

4) My sacroiliac joint (where?) is ‘restricted’ and needs ‘mobilizing’

5) Last, but certainly not least, all of this has resulted in a hinge type joint in my upper back around my ‘thoracic/ lumbar joint’ (do what?).

6) Which in turn is having an effect on my neck and shoulder posture.

Joyous. So basically, i failed my MOT. If i were a car, i'd need 4 new tyres, gear box and steering column. Harumph.

My physio must have seen the look on my face because he told me to not be 'dramatic' about it, and said all i needed to do was 'hit the reset button', which actually comprises of learning how to run using your 'glutes' (butt) first, rather than your 'hams' (hamstrings) when running.

Or alternatively I can get a job in my local bell-tower where I can hop around all day ranting about my hump.
Yours, Igor.

Good gate, bad gait

Some one did say that when you start training for the marathon, you learn lots of new things about yourself.

So far i have learnt the following:

1) I don't like running outdoors (damn)

2) I need more music to run to

3) I need new trainers

The good news is that two of these are damn good excuses to go shopping. Cue a short trip to Nike Town in Oxford Circus and a slight disturbing conversation with local shop assistant 'Dwayne' ("Buy the blue ones mate, they're cool man,").

Fortunately my friend K, who knows what it is to run properly (i.

e. not for a bus), told me about the wonderful Marathon Shop in Covent Garden where you can be measure for a proper pair of running trainers, specifically selected to match something called a 'gate'.

I have since learnt that this is in fact spelt 'gait' and not 'gate'. (Figures).

A short visit to The Marathon Shop later, and after 5 mins running on a swanky computerised treadmill-type thing, i learnt that i have a pronated gait. At this point i was forced to admit i didn't know what a gait was, let alone a pronated one, and did i have to go to the doctor?

For those not 'in the know' this is not a pronated gate:

This, however, is a pronated gait (apparently you can have supinated gait as well, which actually sounds better, and less like it can be treated with natural yoghurt):

Apparently running 26miles on a pronated gait is slightly difficult, so the options are:

a) hop my way around it

b) spend a shed load on some swanky new trainers.

I went for option b. 

And also threw in a new running shirt, new socks, running gloves (v important) and running hat for good measure.

Hoorah. Who knew training for the Marathon could be so much fun?